Legal or not, not everyone’s going to love the smell of your aromatic new hybrid strain wafting past their nostrils. Maybe you have neighbours to consider, or just want the smell extinguished the same time as your joint. In any case, you’ll need more than body spray and a plug-in air freshener. What you need is a sploof.
How a sploof works
A sploof is typically a homemade tool for concealing cannabis use, acting as a filter for the smoke or vapour produced. Though its etymology is murky – it sounds a bit like “spliff” and a bit like “poof” – its construction is crystal clear.
It’s often referred to as a “muffler for marijuana,” but that’s misrepresenting its purpose. It’s not “muffling” the smoke in the way a car’s muffler limits the groan of its engine, it’s altering the constituent elements of your puff so as to mask its telltale scent. Smoke particles pass through your many filters, each particle becoming less distinguishable as its true, weedy self with each layer.
The name of the game here is disguise, not suppression. And like a fake mustache and vaguely European accent, your results with said disguise will vary.
Its efficacy often depends on how much is smoked, and whether you’re ventilating the area via windows, fans, etc.
What you’ll need to make a sploof
- 1 used/stripped toilet paper roll (a half-cut plastic bottle works nicely too)
- 1 rubber band
- Scissors (for the bottle sploof)
- Three to five scented dryer sheets
- Crushed activated charcoal (optional, but more effective)
The toilet roll sploof
Step 1: If you’re starting with a toilet paper roll, you’ll want to place one of your multiple dryer sheets neatly over one of the ends of the roll, wrapping your rubber band around the now-covered opening.
Step 2: Pack the remaining dryer sheets through the open end of the roll. Though it’s a source of contention between sploof enthusiasts, common consensus (and common sense, if we’re being frank) suggests a maximum of 3 or 4 sheets should do the trick. Any less than three and you won’t be filtering much; cluttering it with any more than four might find your smoke billowing out the input end when you set it down.
Step 3 (optional): For the fancier toker, adding some ground activated charcoal will boost the efficacy of your sploof’s filtration.
Step 4: Smoke or vape as you normally would, but rather than blowing your toke freely into the air, press your mouth tightly inside the open end of your brand new sploof and exhale. If done right, the output smoke will smell much more of fresh laundry than a spat with the neighbours.
The bottle sploof
Step 1: If moving forward with the bottle, carefully cut through upper third of the bottle, nearest the opening (momentarily pressing down on the bottle will yield a more even cut). It should resemble a cone when you’re done.
Step 2: Insert the dryer sheets through the open end. The same formula of 3 to 4 sheets applies here. If you’ve got your activated charcoal handy, now’s the time to add it to the mix.
Step 3: As with its toilet roll counterpart, place the remaining dryer sheet over the open end, tying it off tightly with the rubber band.
Step 4: Remove the cap and smoke/vape away, directing the smoke into the orifice of the bottle and watching the flavour fly.
Note: You don’t have to limit yourself to toilet paper rolls or plastic bottles. Many DIY sploof-ers have built equally effective sploofs out of metal pipes or pop cans – most cylindrical objects will do.
The professional sploof
Depending on your level of commitment, an industry-grade sploof might suit you better. Though essentially a more meticulously designed version of its impromptu sibling (multiple layers of activated charcoal and a higher-grade filtration unit), cannasseurs seem to agree you’ll keep a lower profile if you’re willing to shell out $20 or so.
Covering your tracks
Besides a sploof, the best way to clear a space of cannabis smoke is to turn on a fan, crack open a window and perhaps get a bit liberal with air freshener. Candles or incense can be a plus, but aren’t likely to fool the more judicious nose.
As for the flower itself, a tightly packed container stored in a dry, cool location will do the trick. As with the sploof, the market is rife with “best” airtight cannabis containers; however, there’s little discretion that can’t be achieved with a mason jar or standard steel container.